Sunday, February 7, 2016


Two of our Sisters lived in a nice apartment vacated by a senior couple.  Eventually, Elder Christensen had to ask them to move so that another Senior Couple could occupy that apartment. This move meant they would have to move into an apartment formerly occupied by Elders. 
The following poem is a result of that move - sent to the office, in particular, Elder Christensen.  The authoress gave us permission to publish this poem.  Hope you enjoy this as much as we did.
The Apartment: A Sister Graubard composition with moral support by Sister Harding.


"You're moving!" we heard and received our instruction.

From Oak Lawn to Crestwood, what a reduction.

The Elders Abode, but our fears we bid cease. 

After all how bad could it be?

It will be cleaned, assured Elder C. 

And so we packed and agreed to proceed. 


Our first impression, some things that were said:

"This apartment is crazy!"

" Even the showers lost its head!"


And how about that frozen fowl residing in the freezer?

Brought thoughts of Colonel Sanders, the KFC geezer. 

The flightless fowl flew fast to the dumpster. 

We couldn't believe he still had his feathers!


Did Elder Peter Parker stay here? Or else an Elder Tall

We can't explain hand prints on the ceiling 

or shoe prints on the wall

Magically Mr. Clean could come erase them all. 

If Cinderella had cleaned she would have missed her ball!

- The outline of a dartboard 

was what got to us the most. The impact of those long gone darts

made it Holier than the Ghost. 


Some gum chewing chumps stuck their wrappers up and made a foil montage.

We really hoped that what we saw was just a sad mirage.

-Three hours and a toothbrush later we removed it from the wall.

Mr. Clean came for the blue and green stain and it was gone for once and for all!

He saved us from going insane, and knocking down the wall...


We baptized the tub by immersion with the gift and power of Tilex. 

Without such, a baptism of just plain fire would have suited us best. 

Ants came marching in but we set out traps with a sigh.

It's kind of fun to pee and watch a parade go by...


The Refrigerator! Yikes, what a blow! The Leftovers had their own game show!

"Are You Older Than a Fifth Grader?" - Did we really want to know?

Our health would be in "Jeopardy" if we had dined on the contents.

"Who Wants to be a Moldy Millionaire?" was not to be our contest.

But with some rags and bleach we played "Wipeout" and succeeded.

Some TLC and elbow grease was what that poor fridge needed.


Now it's done, and much more fun to live in this apartment.

No mess to see and fresh "Hawaiin Breeze" gently scents the carpet.

The closets are organized, with pamphlets alphabetized. 

Can you say "House of order"?


We're grateful for this place to live

And thank the office staff

For answering our crazy calls

We hope you had a laugh! 

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